Monday, December 19, 2016

holidays

As I've said before, every year I grow a little more bah-humbug about the holiday season. There's so much pressure to 'be happy' and make others happy that many people tend to end up making themselves and each other miserable if their Christmas doesn't fit into some ideal they've conjured up in their minds due to media or family traditions and/or pressures.

I was raised by parents who went with the consumer tradition of purchasing nice gifts to give to friends and family at Christmas, and for a long time I felt obliged to keep up that tradition. As I approached my mid-20s I really started to loathe the practice. Not only was it expensive and time-consuming, but managing to pick a gift the recipient would truly be excited about was always very hit or miss. It's a risky exercise even for the most thoughtful of people. I started going with consumables (boxes of chocolates, tins of cocoa-mixes, etc), since it's easier to gather them in one trip and they tend to have a higher chance of being enjoyed or at least could easily be passed/regifted to others.

Leaving town for the Army spared me a lot of the unnecessary pain of hunting down annual gifts for a minimum dozen other people among immediate and extended family and friends.

Around the time DH and I were separating from the military, DH got a bug to learn how to make his own fancy desserts. He mastered chocolate truffles and after relocating back to my home town we started making goodie bags stuffed with them to pass out at the annual gathering of my extended family - mostly to spare us from the effort and expense of all the 'traditional Christmas shopping'.

We've done different treats like chocolate chip cookes and meringues. As our kiddo sails through toddlerhood we've gotten lazier - this year was chocolate bark and fudge (the quickest and easiest treats I could think of to make). More effort than most conventional shoppers would care to make but I say still beats endless time in malls (either brick OR online ones) and hundreds to thousands of dollars on gifts that your loved ones may or may not even like.

DH and I don't even get each other things anymore; except on occasion if he mentions some gadget or goodie (and it's not terribly expensive or hard to find) I might pick it up and shove it under the tree. Certainly no his and her motorcycles, bling that neither of us ever have the occasion to wear, or overpriced smartphones. There is plenty of spontaneous purchases and picking up of restaurant tabs for each other throughout the year. But in general as far as 'stuff' goes, it seems to work out much better if we treat ourselves when we want to. (Of course as we get better at frugal living new stuff becomes an ever rarer occasion as well.)

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